From My Friendster Blog Part X

Dated: December 8, 2006

Note: Don't worry, it's English so it's safe. I wrote this when I was depressed or something (I think) four years ago and I can't remember why.

"The path to self discovery is hard to find, eventhough you live almost half of your life still you don’t know where to begin. People suffered from pain and agony and familiarizing the defeat was way more comprehensive than it used to be. You may take it as unconceivable. The bitterness, grief, heartache and sadness are all around you and you can’t even leap to the bliss and satisfaction. If there’s a cure for loneliness maybe some of us don’t have to endure to any of its affliction. Some claims that their lives is an ultimate battle, a war and the struggle must come to an end to believe that we must win we must strive as long as we could but what if we can’t fight anymore? What if you want to let go the things that you’re fighting for? Is that a crime? All the things that surrounds you, is it worth fighting for? You don’t know what is right for you and right for them or vice versa. God created us for a reason, as they fortold that centuries ago, if you could only knew the true meaning of your purpose maybe there’s nothing to talk about. Why we have to find it own our own? Is that a part of a deal?"

Here's another one:

Dated: December 6, 2006

"It was a wonderfull morning, a sunny-brightfull day and its a pleasant time to stroll underneath the sunset. As I was preparing my everyday morning rituals before I go to work I stopped for a while and think about what I have now, being a mother and a wife. I know my life is like a full time job and sometimes it pisses me off from time to time because I can’t be what I am before and it will never will be. Everything is a blur and I can’t see my future. They said that I have everything that a normal human can possibly had but it didn’t occured to them that I’m so tired and depressed because of some annoying things that I can’t even remember when to start to count the reason to stress it out. I love my daughter, I love my husband, I love my family but why I feel this way. Did I missed something? Did I have to regret the things that happened? Am I happy? Am I contented? I can’t say yes to reciprocate any of this even the word no. I am 29 years old, enough year to make things least complicated but as they say everyday is a new adventure, ups and downs, even swaying around."


Told yah!