DEATH STAR CANTEEN

Darth Vader: I will have the penne al arrabiata
Canteen Staff: You need a tray...
Darth Vader: Do you know who I am?
Canteen Staff: Do you know who I am?
Darth Vader: This is not a game of "Who the fuck are you?" for I am Vader, Darth Vader, Lord Vader. I can kill you with a single thought.
Canteen Staff: Well, you still need a tray...
Darth Vader: No I wouldn't need a tray, I don't need a tray to kill you. I can kill without a tray with the power of the force which is strong within me though I could kill you with a tray If I so wish. For I can hack at your neck with a thin bid until the blood flow on the canteen floor.
Canteen Staff: No, the food is hot. You need a tray to put the food on...
Darth Vader: Oh I see the food is hot I'm sorry, I did not realize. Oh yes, haha... I thought you're challenging me to the fight to the death?
Canteen Staff: Fight to the death? This is canteen, I work here.
Darth Vader: Yes, but I am Vader... Lord Vader? Everyone challenges me to the death... Lord Vader, Darth Vader?... Sir Lord Vader?...Lord...Sir...Darth?... The Death Star, I run the death Star?
Canteen Staff: What's the Death Star?
Darth Vader: This is the Death Star, you're in the Death Star... I run this Star...
Canteen Staff: This is a Star?
Darth Vader: This is a fucking star... I run it. I'm your boss!
Canteen Staff: Oh you're Mr. Stevens?
Darth Vader: No... I'm... who's Mr. Stevens?
Canteen Staff: He's head of the Catering...
Darth Vader: I'm not the head of the catering... I am Vader, I can kill catering with a thought...
Canteen Staff: What?
Darth Vader: I can kill you with a thought... I can kill you all with a thought... I can kill me with a thought...Fuck! I get a tray...fuck it!...This one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...this one's wet...Did you dry this in a runforest, why?... With the power of the Death Star did we not have a tray which is fucking dry?... No...No..No... I was here first!
1st Customer: You have to form a line if you want food... Well can I have a penne al arrabiata...that will be nice...
Darth Vader: No...Do you know who I am?
2nd Customer: That's Jeff Vader that is?
Darth Vader: No...No...No...I'm not Jet Vader, Im Darth Vader...
1st Customer: What?....Jet Vader, runs the Death Star?
Darth Vader: No...Jeff...I'm Darth Vader, I run the Death Star!
3rd Customer: You're Jeff Vader?
Darth Vader: No...No...No...I'm not Jet Vader, Im Darth Vader...
3rd Customer: Are you his brother, can you get his autograph?
Darth Vader: No I can't get...Jeff...I'm Darth...Alright I'm Jeff Vader... I'm Jeff Vader.
2nd Customer: Can I have your autograph?
Darth Vader: No! Fuck off! Or I will kill you with a tray!... Give me penne al arrabiata or you shall die...and you...and you...and you and everyone else in this canteen. Death by Tray it shall be!
Canteen Staff: Wooooh! Do you want peas with that?
Darth Vader: Peas...it don't have peas! You can't put peas...it's red it doesn't work on penne...you can't unless you push it that will be weird...oh alright put some peas!!