I don't know how to deal with someone who got some issue. I've been there to understand every single strand of his personality and it's too damn exhausting.

Big Mistake

One thing for sure...I made the biggest mistake...I didn't pop the question. Now I regret it for the rest of my life. Cowardly unspoken, guilt...everything... I don't know if it's the right thing to do or in another way around but perhaps it's the best and cause I can't turn back the time... Goodbye is the only word that will sound.

Holy Week

Holy Week or Greater Week, the last week of Easter, Hebdomada Sancta or just plain old words Semana Santa at Mahal na Araw. The days which we depicted as HOLY or bukod sa pasko meron pang tumitino sa araw ng Marso o Abril. It is a tradition among Christianity where we used to lament at Christ crucification. Some sorrow, some are feast. Some used to have their Panata and some are not. I used to have this so-called Panata of mine few years ago, Opo meron at ako po e bumabasa ng pasyon and I have few ten tunes noh! I'm going to start at 10pm and magpapahinga kami by 4am, then kapag friday na balik kami ng 10am until matapos na sya ng 3pm at tsaka kami manonood ng Horror Films na inarkila bago mag mahal na raw hahaha. But after that year I decided to switch and give a little kick, pahirapan daw ba lalo ang sarili. I'm talking about the famous Grotto Walk. I did only one time and that's the last of it. AYOKO NA! I got cramps everywhere, calluses, backpain, bruises and fever after that. Ikaw ba naman maglakad ng nuknukan ng layo na yung Islander ko naging spartan na sa nipis.
This Lenten season, I watched the penitensya (you know,palo-palo sa likod) and unique part was from Tanza (Navotas) some men used to crawl from the street, matching cloth on their face. I freaked out when I first saw that seven years ago e yun pala tradisyon nila yun at akala ko may ginugulping tambay. Gumagapang sila from post to post, libutin ang buong subdivision (and hell ang laki nun ha) and while they pause e hinahampas sila ng ewan ko kung anu tawag dun and you'll start to see them from Monday-Thaursday upto Holy Thursday. Good Friday will be the blast, Ayun may prosisyon ng nagpipinitensya...Ang lansa coz you smell the blood gushing out from their skin at kapag minalas kapa, matatalsikan ka pa ng dugo. I remember when I was a kid, kapag tumungtong na Huwebes Santo wala ng palabas at the afternoon maliban sa Seven Last Words at channel 9 and some few old movies where I watched The San Lorenzo Ruiz Story, Moises (Burt Lancaster) at ang walang kamatayan naThe Redeemer (remember that movie? Yung Christ na hindi nagpapakita ng face). Lubusin mo na kapag thursday dahil magbabalik program lang kapag Easter Sunday na. And when that sunday came, ayun hanapan na ng itlog na halos masira na yung tanim na halaman at bulaklak ng kapitbahay namin na halos habulin kami ng pamalo...hahaha

I respect Men... coz where THINKERS!

Women are full of... brains. And yeah, we speak while our minds starts to assemble another schema that can make your nose bleed.

Always on a thought, can't stop thingkin'. Women are like that. Think—think—think! Can't stop thinking and damn we can't remember the time there’s a silence phase in our head. No more room for happy thoughts—it doesn’t happen and sometimes we can’t sleep, you know why? Because they won’t shut the hell up!

I’ll set an example. You’re lying in the bed and your mind is racing about nothing like;

‘I need to talk to her tomorrow coz I don’t like her speaking to me that way and I have this uncomfortable feeling…wait, did I lock the door? Did I bring my shoes in? Where’s my highschool yearbook? Hmmm what will do to lunch tomorrow?—I don’t know. Why do I think about lunch if I’ll took a good breakfast and that waffles at wafflehouse are good…that’s what I should do start a good breakfast…maybe it should be heavy and I will start one of those high carbs or with fibre coz I have to gain weight…some heavy syrup maybe…seems will work…is that healthy? Is that ok?...Who’s my third grade teacher…sino ba yung hayup nay un…pinatayo ako sa likod nun e…what was that name?…Ms. Sore…Ms. Tabukol…Mrs. Caldero…ay hinde grade one pala yun…Woohhh it’s late I need to go asleep! What the hell am I doing up?—I don’t know…LET ME THINK ABOUT IT.

That’s what us women is all about. I wish could think like men cause man they don’t think as half as much as we do. They don’t spend a lot of time thinking. They think about it, thought about and moving on. That’s it, that’s why they enjoy a lot of things. They enjoy a lot but not to think about it like ‘let’s do some booze—let’s see girls—they don’t mind—have a happy time’. For women, we think all the time, talk all the time. It’s so hard to articulate what we want, what we need, what we feel, torturing ourselves while avoiding the verbal word DIRECT. And if that happens, we run across for them to call us being the bitch. And we can’t handle that. We can’t handle being the stupid, the low thinker. That’s why women developed some kind of a strategy. Instead of being a moron, coming out and telling the guy something or asking the guy something, us—women turned out to be tricky. Do you guys wonder why women always looking at you like he’s going to eat you... alive... literally? Staring at the things you do, the things you said, always correcting you in every way, laying some sort of propaganda? Here’s a hint; Women are counting down the things you should or shouldn’t do, drafting the days how you will survive. A TEST, so to speak. Law Bar Exam ain’t nothing on us and men doesn’t realize that we failed them the test and nothing—Zippo! Have no idea that they taken it. Hell and misery and men were not aware the ordeal is in progress.

Here’s an example; when a guy usually goes home first and there’s a dirty dishes in the sink, they don’t even bother washing it. Instead they put their ass to the sofa and watch the late night TV. A minute or an hour later, she comes home and sees the dishes as if there’s a boat without a navigator. She will be pissed, and you knew damn well she will be, but you don’t even care to bother. She will look at you, smiling blandly, asking you your day, what did you eat, etc. while forcing herself not to be furious. She ain’t gonna say anything about what she discovered at the kitchen (trust me, ginawa ko na yan). And while you, getting comfy with beer and a remote on your hand, have no idea she’s downloading the things she sees, creating a folder with a little icon ‘asshole’ with your face on it that says DISHES and save to her brain. Three more days, dishes still there, but no words still. Then came fourth, fifth until the sixth and, you, the bastard, still withstand superiority. Until she finally decides to and double click that folder, saying ‘What is this guy telling me? Is he imploring that I’m the dishwasher around here? I’m put on this earth to wash the god damn dishes ‘coz I’m working too and hell will never do that!’... I will see how long this dishes pile up till he washed it.

Another week gone by and she’s pissed off finally, realizing that there isn’t any clean glass but toothpicks. She will not going to kill you by poisoning you—oh no, no. But you just let her open the gates of hell for you. And for women it doesn’t end there. Because women something pissed about in the kitchen, will end up in the bedroom while you guys have no hint about it. What was happened in that few weeks, shall snaps to your face. What guys capable of? You’re not getting laid for a few weeks just to let you know you fucked it up.

"Bi" Now... Gay Later...

Do you ever wonder if you're not what you are? Does it occurred to you that there is something more in your closet? Are you afraid of letting it out?

Ok, let's be honest... Are you GAY?!

Who among us are afraid of letting some secrets that someone will recent it? Well Hell Yeah!! All of Us. I have a friend which impossible for him to reveal himself to be gay, how do I know? I watch every movement of his for the past 10 years and I have that proof. I told him "Dude! I will accept the things which is not even familiar to me" pertaining to my friend, exaggerating myself with an open mind, but still he gives me a smirk. For almost a decade I never ask him if his... you know "the other" because I might end up in a dumpster. I mean what part of Gay you don't know about?

There are huge numbers of people, celebrities, friends, co-workers and even on movies that expose themselves as gay people. The controversial revelations of Rustom Padilla(Actor), the littlest singer/song writer Aiza Seguerra, hollywood comedian Ellen deGeneres and her fiance Portia de Rossi. Guys these are the big names (well some of it) of gayest people, so ask yourself "do you have to hide it?" Some say Yes some say "No" and some say "I can't tell, I don't know" You better think of something else's excuse when it becomes to that.

Some gays or lesbian have these issue that somehow they are too afraid to show it all. I don't mind if you ask me because they have lives too, and certainly that life was their own and no one, not even us can be judge to that.

In military, gays are not accepted, why? because others might say "Fagot can't save us"...huh?! Hell, if they want to save the country, let them be 'coz other men are not joining even they're straight. Who's the fagot now? Damn! Gender confuse is the big issue for them. You better put in mind that "what you hate will end up in your family". I have a friend you hated the other kind but end up with a gay brother. Now that's what I'm talking about.

They are not a plague, well atleast some of it. Some gay people humiliate their own kind and that pisses me off "How can others understand if some of you guys disgraced yourselves?" I watch some documentary about them, and it freaks me out. They, dressed up as a lady, lurking late at night to look for some guys to make...you know, A hand Job? What the fu@k is that? Are you crazy enough to humiliate your family and your own species? Why don't you be like Inno Sotto or Ricky Reyes? Or even the Fav Five? I know being gay is the expression of free will but think of what you may become if you ended up as one of those "bastusan type". Try to make more civil okay, I'm here to understand all of you(kala mo may power e noh)but me more careful.

Hallow's Eve!!

Freaked out...HOOOLLAAA!!It's BER, before Christmas Halloween muna(anu kaya featured sa Magandang Gabi Bayan?) Where did the word Halloween came from? It started sa word "All-hallow-even"(wikipedia.org) or some history may call them "Pooky Nights" or something at para sa tin Filipino e "wag kang manakot..anak ng teteng!" Then all shows sa TV ay related na sa mga spooky thing, tulad na lang ng pinapanood ko ngayon Brat Pitt's Interview with Vampire na kung ganun lang ang look ng all vampire powtah ako ang hahabol sa kanila. The few early episodes of MGB (Magandang Gabi Bayan) tuwing sasapit ang month ng October were facinating talaga like the episode which they featured the Tugatog-Kalookan Cemetary(if you remember?)the statue which depicted St. Michael & the devil. If you can imagine na baligtad ang pagkakagawa coz si San Miguel ang nasa ilalim at si Satan ang nasa above(ewww!). How about the chilling Balete Drive? The road to Baguio? and the Corrigedor(tama ba spelling?)pustahan tayo maglalabasan nanaman yan. The movie that gave me goosebumps was Bruce Willis and H.J. Osment's The 6th Sense, anak ng weteng na yan, kung makikita mo lang ako nung time na pinapanood ko yan sus tatawa ka. Nanakit katawan ko dyan. Ahhh eto papala The Blair Witch Project issue yan before year 2000, Oh yeah the hell na napaniwala nila ang marami and ako rin na muret e ganun din. I saw it in the big screen, my sis told me na,"Ano tol, maganda?"...ang sagot ko..."Nasuka ako"...."Bakit nakakadiri ba?"......"HINDEEE!!!Nahilo ako sa camera!"