ALUMNUS 94

Many years ago (lost count) there’s this small private school in Valenzuela. No one could ever believe that that is a school because of the appearance. How can you ease your doubt if you see geese roaming around, huge rabbits at the back, fishpond near the gate (no fish folks but tadpoles), less than fifteen classrooms, a stage that looks more like a porch, and one janitor? Yup, like everybody says, ‘Private yan?’

It was June 1991, the year we began our new life as highschool, ranges twelve to thirteen years old. The year we met new students, the year we hear weird section names (thought to be a scientific creatures but it’s not), the year public graduates met the privates, the year we saw ‘ang liit nung boy oh’, and the year we all hear our nanay says, ‘Highschool na anak ko.’ How can you forget those first times (not that first time, the other first time)? We feel kinda scared that we might end into that weirdo groupie, the slackers, the genius, the bozos, the notorious, and we might ended up as an outcast too if we’re isolated because neither one of us had no clue.

The Students

We all know each other, I mean, all of us for four years, others more than that. I came from a public school along with my friend. The large percentage between public and privates are neck to neck. I thought I was going to have a hard time at first coping with new faces and new, what you can call, sense of prejudice. But I realized, we are all just kids, all the same, and they, too, tackling the new beginning.

As much like any other kids, we have it all; the Weirdos, nerds, athletes, those with compulsive behaviors, Elites, beauty queens and beauty queen-alike and feeling beauty queen, the hunks, the humbly, the mayabang, the trouble makers, the notorious, the anonymous, the loner, the joker, the siopao moocher, the slurpy wolfers, the Mang Ramon Fanatics, and so on. Our small society of students builds up every year, and every year gained even more; ups and downs, left and right, back and forth. Possibly, endless.

The Teachers

One of our great teachers and, until now, after for so many years she’s still hammering the heads of youngsters just to edify how the world of languages, the history, and the morality of being a great individual really are. She’s handling English, History, and Values Education for numerous number of students for the last two decades (I think), known for her noting question such as ‘Okay?—Alright’, her colleagues calls her Candy (don’t ask), her students calls her… ah…nevermind (baka malintikan tayo). She’ll look at you straight in the eye after catching your drolly eyes. Better straighten that posture or she’ll eat you alive with that double vista of her. How about this teacher with that hard-to-hear tone that you have to smack your seatmate’s head to shut him up just to hear her out, and that steno-like writing on the blackboard that confuses the ‘g’ into a ‘9’? And the legendary Science teacher that gives you chill everytime she asked you a questions like what’s the definition of this-the formula of that, where’s your experiment and explain your conclusion clearly or she’ll make you stand for the rest of the class, dictating all of the notes instead using the board because she’s allergic to chalk, demands to remove the spring of your notebook and replace it with colored yarn or whatever you may call it, cover it with art paper such as blue, red, yellow, and, sometimes, kung mamalasin ka nga naman, the gayest color of all, PINK! However, within her burns the glint of a dedicated teacher. And though she displays her bubbly persona to her colleagues, she utterly hates those who can’t catch up with her—students who can’t buy her rules. And that time one of us was entitled to have that small percentage of idiocy and defying policy. So, therefore, to make things short, she hates us all hahaha.

ARCHIVES

July 16: The Earthquake

Who would ever forget the incident that changed the rest of our country and the rest of our lives? Friday, July 16, 1991—no, we’re not talking about Jose’s birthday—it was the 7.7 Earthquake.

It was field day, or fri-day, or whatever day—basta natatandaan ko may gathering n’on (give me a break guys, it’s more than a decade, ok?). Some of the students already gone from school, others remain when that earthquake trampled Metro Manila and nearby cities. It was a disaster—because we learn how to use the rosary and have its own misteryo hehehe (natawa pa enoh?). They said they hold hands and circled the flag pole, duck at the mud, and the others, well, you know, scream. There’s no cellphone that time to call or text what happened (yeah, yeah, we know, Jurassic na kami), we ended up watching news or focused our ears in the radio. That time, few of us been traumatized, lalong lalo na yung may birthday. Damn that was bad.

Where’s the Heart?

Our school is a sacred Catholic; they teach us how to be a good Christian. One of the students bought this ‘Sacred Heart’ image of the Christ and posts it on the wall of their classroom. Obviously, when you say ‘Sacred Heart’ it emphasized the heart of Christ, which is shown the flaming heart with thorns. However one day, one incident happened, this so-called Heart mysteriously disappeared… I mean, really disappeared—poof gone! And all was left was… well, none. It’s like an error printing of some kind. Some witnesses said it was there few days ago, then viola! And what can you expect from a thirteen year-old boys and girls who witness the disappearing of that so-called miracle? Yup, they whine a lot until the faculty decided to suspend the classes.

The “3×4”

Students who enrolled on our school must now the rules and regulations; the proper hygiene and the proper uniform. We, girls, must wear proper uniform, button sleeves, ribbons and ID’s while boys; black pants, white polo with school logo or patch, all the same. Not unless one week from the monthly exam date is announced. They must do the “3×4” (ask the barbero, he’ll know what to do) or pay the consequence. Have no idea? Try to find MC Hammer’s MTV’s ‘Can’t touch this’. Yup, that’s what I’m talking about.

(to be continued)

Transformers: I was, and still like, a child

I watched the Transformer: Revenge of the Fallen on DVD last Sunday (sadly, I didn’t make it in full screen, and who the hell is The Fallen anyway?), and I was like, Hell Yeah!

This Witwickey boy named Sam, and his gf Mikaela was trapped between wars of the robots (Autobots and Decepticons). I remember the name of Witwickey, and that is Spike, the little boy who clings with Bumblebee, and Mikaela, yes she’s hot, but where’s her part in the originals? I know, I know… like Titanic—can you imagine how boring it could be if Jack and Rose wasn’t there, who will watch a sunken ship for two hours?

Though the storyline is not that…hmmm… feisty, the ‘sci-fi’ is damn good. Raised the roof!!

I am a great fan of the Transformers G1 from its first episode till the producers killed Optimus Prime on the fourth movie (at least I think it was). I’m so angry that time, and I think that day was the first time I said the word P***** Ina! Damn it! For all these years, Prime and Megatron fought drastically since the beginning and that so-called movie of which made Ultra Magnus fucked his chance to be a leader and the protagonist died in one single blow because of that stupid Hot Rod a.k.a. Rodimus Prime. And in his deathbed he said something like ‘Do not grieve. Soon I will be with the Matrix’. Oh my god, he’s going to die. But wait the rule is if he does not turn gray, he’s okay. However moments later, he passed away, dramatically, and turned GRAY with whining robots on the side. Waaahh!! Now this is really make young ladies cry—nerds alike cry even more. The producers thought the results will be exceptional to have Prime be dead. They didn’t know how popular the leader of the Autobots really is. Some kids walkout in the movie theater after first twenty minutes of the movie when Prime passed over his leadership. Well, if I was there, I’ll bust a cap on that screen. Since then, I stopped watching the Transformers even after they resurrect Prime in some episodes.

They killed him again in the sequel live action movie. There’s this scene that Optimus was ganged up, and I’m expecting the worse. When he was flipped to the air, dropped at the ground, I said, ‘Don’t you dare tell me he’s dead?’ and that Sam boy shouted ‘Optimus!’ then I realized he is officially dead (What’s with the shout? No one calls him Optimus, it should be Prime. They are like Chinese, given name should come second). I want to leave my seat and off that player. ‘This is ridiculous,’ I said to myself (bear with me guys, I’m not the only one finding that part frustrating). My friend told me he’ll be revive and join with Jetfire, and I said, ‘Oh great genius, now you spoil the movie. What’s with the joining? Jetfire is an old machine Blackbird—how did that happen?—a scrap with a cane that supposed to be a Valkyrie Jet fighter. If they dare debunked Prime again, I swear to god I’m gonna kill the maker of the story line, and I’m not going to be imaginative. I’m just gonna shoot them on the back of the head in broad day light and embrace the punishment!’ and she said, ‘Is he really that stupid? Prime is not a humanist, he’s just stupid.’ I was shocked hearing that, then I said, ‘No. He’s just pretentious.’

I remember when I was in gradeschool I have a classmate who has a big crush on Optimus Prime. I am a crazed fanatic, but she’s crazier than I am. She has this huge poster na nakadikit sa ceiling, a numerous assembled Prime robots in the cabinet, and a collection of videos of Transformers (BetaMax). And I, all I have was stickers. How can you fantasize a robot? All he had was a covered mouth-face and a horn-like antenna. But she said, ‘Mabait kasi s’ya.’ Nyeeee!

Every December 25, 1986 to 1989, networks used to aired cartoon movies like; Voltron the Movie, Transformers the Movie, GI Joe the Movie for viewers to watch. Now, you have to download in the internet or go to Quiapo to find a DVD. Franchising too was also ‘hit’ today, the made a re-make of those cartoons to real live action. Few weeks ago, GI Joe was on the big screen, few months ago, Astroboy, before that, Dragon Ball, and before before that, I think the first animated ever made to a movie, about twenty years ago, the rival of Ghostbuster on ABS CBN is the pizza lover Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on IBC—not that I hate mutants but I kinda like Slimer’s gang. I’m like ‘wow’ kulang na lang is Challenge of the Gobots (remember that kids, the battle of the six robots, three on the con side and three on pro side? No? Okay, I’ll give you a hint; robots with expressive aura and fingernails). How about Superfriends (that’s JLA to you)? How that Wonder Twins transforms in the middle of the battle to screw things up along with their monkey sidekick, while Robin the boy wonder pisses me off when saying his ‘surprise’ gestures, and how Aquaman unite with the dolphins using telepathic ek ek. The Care Bears (hahaha), Rainbow Bright, and that crazy clan of dwarves with one female Smurfs. I missed those days. But the real thing for me was Prime and his subordinates. I can communicate and mingle with everybody regards to them. Nothing compares to that. More than fifteen years since I saw them again and I still like the old ones, though the drawings are kinda crappy kahit na may new versions emerged on some network. I am 32 years old, and like me, halos lahat ng ka-age ko is an aficionado. Bringing back that old cartoon show felt like a kid again. Excited and jumpy. ‘Starscream you asshole!’ I always say… but kahit na sa cartoons na yan ako nagsimula magsalita ng bad words, I won’t regret it. Because having that experience is the most treasure thing of all as I could grow old and watch the Transformers and be nine again. Amen…